High Times dating

Discover why we choose one romantic partner over another.

2017.05.21 18:57 CoachToughLove Discover why we choose one romantic partner over another.

Discuss the biological differences between men and women in regards to attraction.
[link]


2019.10.28 00:17 Rahvenar Male dating strategy

FemaleDatingStrategy but with a twist.
[link]


2014.06.30 10:10 7chakras Facts about Relationships in Love, Business and Life

What is relationship? Let's define relationship. Relationship is a defined interaction between/among two or more persons or groups in which the protocols are decided beforehand. So protocols are the thread. If you follow those protocols, you make healthy relationships. If you do not follow them, you end up in the clutches of abusive relationships with others.
[link]


2020.12.02 04:22 awkwardaquarius03 Is this guy being creepy? And if so, what do I do?

I'm currently out of high school and taking a gap year due to the virus that shall not be named. I have known this guy John since kindergarten. he was in the same year as me but I graduated high school a year early. In 10th grade we dated for two months. I broke things off because I felt he was too clingy. we remained kinda friends.

I ran in to him walking a few weeks ago (the school I went to is near my house) We reconnected and I hesitantly agreed to coffee. I wanted to clear things up that no we are not in a relationship and no we will not ever be in one, it seemed he wanted to get back together.

we meet for coffee, but he says he is going to walk to my house and have me drive him. after he sent the text he showed up. I made it clear that we would meet at two but he had to be gone by 4:30 because I was tutoring a girl after. this was in text message.

we drive to the coffee place and I am in Ems. I worked 6pm to 6am that morning. I'm dead tired. I drown a double expresso and our "outing begins" He starts to mention some weird stuff. I talked about my job and joked that I had a terrible bed side manner. He replied "is that an invitation?"
I played it off. later he asked if my parents were home, I said no. He then asked if we went back to my place if we would be home alone. I said that my sibling was home and working on homework. he then said oh disappointedly. I looked at the time and said that I would have to go soon and if his brother was picking him up here or at my house. he asked why I was cutting it short. I reminded him I had to Tutor someone at 4:45. He then mentioned wanting to watch me tutor this girl. I said she is a client and she might be at my place for a couple of hours and that I would head to bed after tutoring her. He conceded and he said his brother would be at my house at 5:15, and that I should have told him earlier.
I ordered more coffee because I was close to falling asleep due to being up almost 48 hours. he said if I was so tired I could have napped at my place and he would have been fine watching me. I finally get in the car (with him) to head home. he then asks me If I knew my friend (Avery) was into BDSM. (I did, but I know that she hasn't told anyone, she's also a lesbian) he then starts reading off her kinks, somehow he is correct. I told him that I didn't know and that Avery and I don't talk much (lie).
We make it back to my house and luckily my mom is home. we awkwardly wait and chat until the girl I'm tutoring arrives, I head into the study room with her, and John is just waiting by the door.
I believe he leaves after, my mom treats him like a son because his mom died of cancer about 5 years ago. and cause we have known each other a while.

I'm really confused. is he being creepy? I called Avery and asked because I know for a fact she didn't talk about BDSM with him. But before this outing he has been really nice. she confided in me that during lunch John told Avery that he still loved me?

I don't reciprocate, but if he is being creepy, how do I get out of meeting with him again?
submitted by awkwardaquarius03 to relationship_advice [link] [comments]


2020.12.02 04:22 AlexWang111 The Most Important Innovations Of "Watches"

The Most Important Innovations Of
With some companies producing counterfeits of the Swiss brand, the country's specialist departments are doing their best to fight fraudsters. The illegal use of the quality mark thus leads to the confiscation of assets and heavy fines.

The recognized leaders with a Japanese "residence" are Miyota and SEIKO. Both brands create mechanisms of high precision and reliability in price segments from budget to premium. Japanese watch movements are mainly used in watches made by Asian companies.

Material Body

Different materials are used for the boxes, which differ in strength, reliability and, of course, cost. The quality of the raw materials is reflected in the cost of the stopwatch. The main materials are plastic, alloy, brass, steel, titanium. Jewelry of this type is also often decorated with gold plating (e.g. Q645-402Y). Such models emphasize the status of the owner, and their cost significantly exceeds the price of traditional metal equipment.

Case


The metal case of a wristwatch is called the case and is intended to protect the mechanism from damage. The life of the watch depends on the quality and strength of the case. When choosing a watch, pay attention to the material it is made of. The most popular is stainless steel, it looks elegant and does not require additional coatings. The luxury models are available in gold, silver, titanium or platinum. And for the middle-class watches, copper or brass is used with gold or silver plating.

Bracelet


https://preview.redd.it/p35wj8zpzo261.jpg?width=1911&format=pjpg&auto=webp&s=9971d2fd4162d11ef3be68710cdc0638a651e179
The bracelets usually match the color scheme, style and material of the case, which can be anything: gold, silver, steel, platinum, titanium. There are also combination bracelets that are made of several metals at the same time. To change the size, the links can be removed.

Belt


The carriers are also available in different materials and colors. The leather strap is a classic material, natural, pleasant to touch and comfortable to wear. Materials like cloth, nylon, rubber, silicone, rubber, and plastic are also widely used.

Buy A Watch Based On A Certain Amount Of Money

Sometimes the buyer is faced with the task of choosing a watch without exceeding a predetermined amount of money. In this case, the first wish is to find a watch that offers as many options as possible for the same price. As a result, watches are often not bought from reputable companies and sometimes not from Swiss companies. I would like to make some recommendations in this regard. For example, in our opinion, it is much better to choose a watch made of fine steel and gold, or simply get gold plated by a well known and respected company with a rare mechanism or very rare functions, rather than spending time looking for a gold watch for US $ 3,000 - Wasting dollars interesting and useful. If the most important thing for you in watches is the precision of your movement, it is better to choose a quartz watch (especially since the Swiss quartz movement is very reliable and popular all over the world) than to buy more expensive mechanical watches.

Functionality


The first thing you need to do is determine which functions of the clock are critical: Do you need a calendar, backlight, or alarm clock? These requirements can be based on the selection.

The Most Important Innovations Of "Watches"

Baselworld 2017 promises to inspire its visitors with an incredible variety of new products. The Swiss watch brand Rolex has already announced the premiere of its latest development, the Rolex Sea-Dweller. This year the model celebrates its 50th anniversary! The range of the watch house also includes the Rolex Daytona, Rolex Yacht-Master I, Rolex GMT-Master II, Rolex Day-Date 40 and others.

The Bulgari brand wants to present its new product to visitors: the Octo Roma model. In return, the watchmaking company Hublot presents its line of classic models, Classic Fusion Berluti. Swiss watch brand H. Moser & Cie. will delight wealthy visitors with an exquisite dial in its latest Endeavor Perpetual Calendar Purity.

No international watch exhibition in Basel is complete without the participation of the Swiss watch giant Omega. This year, the brand will present to its guests the Speedmaster Racing Master Chronometer sports watch that will impress sports fans.

The power reserve indicator is one of the essential features of mechanical watches. Shows how much time remains before the watch stops and when it needs to be rewound. In general, watches are mostly chosen based on the nature of your hobby or occupation. Travelers always check to see if there is a world time display that allows them to move to other time zones. Athletes prefer chronographs, ie watches with a stopwatch, while business people ask for the "perpetual calendar".
submitted by AlexWang111 to u/AlexWang111 [link] [comments]


2020.12.02 04:20 Spruce-Chan Getting Revenge on my Ex!

Getting Revenge on my ex!!
HELLO!!! Ok first things first I haven’t been on here in over a year but that’s only bc I’ve been busy woth work, graduated a year early and some how got big depressed bc of this COVID stuff...But I highly doubt anyone really cares I just wanted to say hello I am back and let’s get in to this xD
So there is the guy, let’s call him EB. Let’s give you guys some info about him.. We dated for almost a year or what ever last year. I really liked him and I think once loved him. He’s 20 right now and when I dated him he was 18 going on 19. He’s been a dad since he was 16 but barely sees his daughter at ALL and she’s now 3 or 4 years old? I don’t remember but anyway I tried to do anything for him and get everything he wanted. He had no job (he did for like a couple of months), and he was a year or two late to graduate but the only reason why he graduated this year was bc I did his homework, again I did what ever to keep him happy.. I also bought him flowers, wrote a lot of little letters and put them all in a jar about how much I loved him with some candy with it. His family even loved me and said that I was the only girl that made him smile and laugh when ever I was around. His mom mostly loved me, one time I hung out with her for 3 hours one day all bc he got called him to work. I mean I love hanging out with her! It was my choice to stay and get to know more of the family and more about him! His mom kept on saying how good of a father he was to his daughter, took care of her and how the mother wasn’t much involved till she moved away but her mom and dad now take care of the little one now. All she ever did was hide in his room and can put to play with her for like and hour, take some pictures of her and went back in to the room. While I was with his mom and her telling me about how much I made him happy made me think that he was the one bc he made me happy as well.. till things got kinda out of hand. We broke up about three or two times. The first time bc of these two snobs, let’s call them R and C. They broke us up all bc I was still sending money to my ex. (Him and I were done and the time and knew I was in a new relationship but I was still helping him out bc he literally had no one else) yes I know that sounds bad and now you guys are probably now Saying that isn’t ok but I was about to drop all of that till he broke up with me and a month later slept with the two girls that broke us up and was telling his stuff. After that a while later we got back together bc of my best friend, let’s call her BFF!! She helped me threw everything and still is! I love her with all I am and trust her with all I am! Also tbh i don’t really remember how we broke up the other two times but I’m gonna guess it’s bc how “clingy” I was or started to call him out for lying and cheating on me with a 15/14 year old and flirting with other girls. He put me threw hell, he took my things, he used me, and led me on for sooo long. I still kinda do miss him still but I don’t ever want him back. Now “engaged” and about to have another kid... (to remind you it hasn’t even been a full year since he stopped seeing each other) they only been together for about 6-7 months? They don’t have their own place yet, he just now got a new job, and still barely sees his first daughter but now his “ fiancé” is 24 weeks pregnant. She is in the hospital right now because her water broke with out her realizing and now the babies head is shaped in to a foot ball and the baby may or may not even make it and I know that’s sad to say but what’s even worse is that EB isn’t even in the hospital with her. He is two hours away from her at home flirting with other girls behind her back while she deals with the stress of might losing her first child. I know he is cheating on her bc he ask my best friend if she was dtf (wanted to sleep together) and he sent my best friend a D pic.. I have it all on video and have the WHOLE conversation but idk when I should tell his “ fiancé” yes this is my revenge but the baby is more important. If I tell her now the baby might die of stress even faster but I do think she deserves to know, everyone does even if they don’t like you and I know she doesn’t like me very much but I also never really talked to her. So this is where I need everyone’s help. Should I tell her now and risk being the reason why her baby died or should I say nothing till she gets back home safe? I know either way EB will probably get kicked out and have no where to go and be looked at like a most crappiest person in the world and I want to make him feel like a crappy person that he is. I know this story isn’t that great or anything but I just wanted to get it off my chest and sorry for not much detail. Let me know how I can make it better and I will be updating once she knows the news and the tea has been spilt.
(Yes I know they might have a chance to see this post but I kinda highly doubt it but if they see it they see it. I just kinda think it’s funny bc karma kinda just gave me the wheel and told me to go for it so I Took the opportunity!)
submitted by Spruce-Chan to RegularRevenge [link] [comments]


2020.12.02 04:18 drick2 I haven't been around people my age in years and it hurts

I've been relatively introverted my whole life but never had an issue making friends, the majority of people I take a liking too tend to reciprocate and although I'm not publicly outgoing, I like most, very much enjoy being social. When high school ended I decided not to go to college, I was also in the midst of a then 3 year long relationship. My girlfriend at the time was pretty much the source of my entire social life, when I initially met her I was slowly falling out of favor from my friend group and basically jumped social circles entirely when we started dating. That relationship is long since over, and I haven't had a friend group or even really a genuine bestie since - its been about four years. My father had started a business when I was leaving high school, and considering I didn't know what the fuck I "wanted to do with my life" (still don't) I figured to make some money I'd help him, along with my brother, to run it. Bad choice, but ultimately I'm unsure what would be worse in my situation - wage slaving for family or wage slaving for a unfeeling corporation. Anyways! Like most people the overwhelming majority of my time is spent working. In my situation however, not only is my time egregiously restricted, but the demographic of our clientele is comprised of old folk and middle age folk - meaning I am never around people my age... ever. (24m) I'd say this pandemic has amplified my stress over it, and it may have, but I've been in this position for a while now. I know ultimately I need to leave this job, and expose myself to another environment but during the interim - would anyone have any suggestions as to how about I should deal with meeting people? I feel like its so hard to find friends on the web.. I feel as though I'd be imposing myself on others by reaching out to what are essentially perfect strangers. I just really badly want some friends to talk to on a real level. I have frequent contact with one of my bestfriends from high school, but as we are now grown it feels mostly forced as he's in a similar situation and getting together to hang out (which we haven't since the pandi started) now feels strange and awkward - we just aren't the same people we were. The hardest part about all this - we are all subject to having the majority of our socializing boiled down to pointless transactional communication considering the amount we work, I however don't have the retreat of someone(s) I want to talk to, someone I can really talk to.
Leave advice if you want, but at any rate I appreciate all who have taken the time to read this and if you're in a similar situation, I wish you luck. (also, be my friend)
submitted by drick2 to offmychest [link] [comments]


2020.12.02 04:15 hotToast3798 [Rant] i'm pretty sure i'm a lesbian?

This ended up being really long so i'll put a tl;dr at the end
i'm 16 and i've known i liked girls since a few years ago. i think it's been in my mind subconsciously since about 6/7th grade? it became a more important pervasive thing since 8th grade when i had a major crush on my best friend, which i'll talk more about later.
Early signs:
looking back at it now, there were definitely some early signs. when i was about 9/10 years old, i had a crush on a girl on my sports team. not only were we on the same team, but our sisters were also on the same team (different from ours). i remember always wanting to hang out with her and hoping she would be at our sisters' games and tournaments. i would get butterflies when i saw her and hung out with her. i think i remember wanting to kiss her. i didn't realize this was a crush at the time, i probably thought i wanted to be her best friend (lmao). looking back on it now, this was a very clear sign
Recent crush:
so about the crush i had/have on one of my best friends. it started early 8th grade. i've known this girl since the beginning of middle school and we were kinda friends, but we became very close in 8th grade. i go to an art school and we both have the same major, so it was easy for us to become friends. i was seriosuly in love with her by the middle of 8th grade. we were so close that it honestly felt like we were dating and other people thought we were dating too. i was so happy. i wasn't sure if she was straight, but i knew she liked guys; i had no evidence that she liked girls. that thought went more towards the back of my mind because i was so in love with her.
that year she hurt me a lot (emotionally, not physically). she was kinda gaslight-y. there were times where our relationship was very strained. this was partly my fault too, but she greatly overreacted sometimes or misunderstood something and she would cut me off for days or weeks at times and acted like she despised me. it made it really hard to apologize, and she would only start talking to me again if i apologized or if she got over it. This was greatly exacerbated by my love for her, which made it hurt so much more. it really fucked me up. but at the same time, she made me so happy when our relationship was good.
in the middle of 8th grade was when she decided to move schools for highschool while i was staying at the same school (which has both a middle and high school). it really hurt because i still liked her and still had hopes that she might like me back. this is a reality i had to struggle with the rest of 8th grade
all of the arguments, her switching schools, and overall emotional fluctuations put me in some bad places for the rest of the year, starting that winter (the winter of 2018). when i first started liking her (in the fall of 8th grade, 2018) i was so happy and hopeful. in around february i started struggling with some alcohol abuse. i was only 14 at the time. when i felt like shit it made me feel better and i could forget about my feelings, even if it was only for a night. i didn't drink every night or anything and i didn't become dependent, but i used it as an escape when my mind went to shit.
side note: i absolutely do not recommend self-medicating with drugs, especially at that age, to solve these kinds of problems. it didn't make anything better and only made things worse.
that summer we kinda fell off, but we talked a few times. she travels to europe all summer because she has family there, so i didn't hang out with her at all. this may have been for the better; it allowed me time to heal and collect my thoughts. i rarely drank at this point
in 9th grade we were at different schools and were talking and hanging out a little, but it was on and off throughout the year. my feelings definitely did fade during this time, but they never went away. during covid we texted eachother a few times, but not much more than that.
fast forward to 10th grade and we started talking more and i'm in love again. it might not be as significant as before because i don't see her that often, but there's definitely feelings. things are a lot different and she's definitely grown out of some of her bad phases. i still would love to date her but i'm pretty sure she's straight and i respect that. i'm okay with staying friends and i wouldn't want to ruin our friendship. i still have never admitted to her or anyone else that i liked her, but she and others may have had some suspicions. in 8th grade she made jokes about me having a crush on her, but i'm still not sure. i'm sure one day i'll tell her, but not anytime soon. i'm not even out yet.
why i'm still not sure if i'm a lesbian:
so i think we clearly established that i like girls. there's other girls i've had smaller crushes on over the past year or two as well. the problem is that i don't know if i like guys at all. i've had crushes on guys, but the last crush was in elementary school. they weren't anything like the crushes i have now on girls. i haven't had an actual crush on a guy since 5th grade.
so why am i not sure!? well, my school is made up of almost 3/4 girls, and there are very few guys. i thought that maybe the reason i haven't had crushes on guys is because there aren't many guys at my school. but maybe this is just an excuse to label myself as bi? i really don't know. i think i've tricked myself into having crushes on guys, but it's pretty clear they didn't mean anything. i don't think i can imagine myself being with a guy, but i haven't had a guy friend since elementary school. i don't think labels are that important, but i've been struggling with this. when realized i liked girls a few years ago i thought i could confidently say i was bi, but i don't think i have a real attraction to guys. i really want a girlfriend though.
luckily, there's a very accepting environment at my school. a large portion of people are lgbtq+ (possibly a majority, but at least like 30-40%). my family is okay, kinda conservative but not religious. my mom would be accepting i'm pretty sure and i'm closest to her. i've dealt with some internalized homophobia, but i think this mainly stems from me wanting to blend in and not stand out.
tl;dr
i think i'm a lesbian. there were some early signs i realized later on. i was absolutely in love with my best friend in 8th grade but it was a strained relationship at times which put me in some dark places. we fell off in 9th grade, but now in 10th grade we're talking more and i like her again and a lot of things have changed, though i think she's straight. i'm still not out to anyone nor have i told anyone about the crush i mentioned before. i'm not sure if i like guys, i haven't had a crush on a guy since elementary school and i can't imagine myself dating one. again, i'm pretty sure i'm a lesbian

sorry for this rant. i've never really put all of these thoughts together before and i wanted it to go out somewhere. thanks for reading this.
submitted by hotToast3798 to LGBTeens [link] [comments]


2020.12.02 04:12 LeoLike-Lion Girl [20F] I [18M] am dating wants to slow down

Context: I’ve known this girl (woman??) since sophomore year in high school, and we started dating around then. We dated for 2 years, but broke up because I was extremely immature and cheated (texted a few other girls) near the end of our relationship. All that being said, I understand her hesitation.
Fast forward to a few months ago. I’ve changed a lot, and we recently got back in touch. I am working really hard to show I can be better than what I displayed when I was sixteen. I know it may come across as wasteful to pursue this sort of relationship at this age, but she was (and is) an amazing person who I really enjoy spending time with. Unfortunately, from her perspective, I know there is little reason to continue this. That being said, I’ve taken her on a multitude of dates, done my best to be completely forthright, etc.
Over time, we’ve kind of got into this flow of essentially being in a relationship, even though it’s not quite official. She is getting uncomfortable with that. She made this promise back when I cheated that she wouldn’t get back into a relationship with me until I completed my freshman year of college, but I’ve only just finished my first semester. As a result, she told me she wants things fo slow down. She doesn’t feel comfortable rushing into something with me, because she doesn’t trust me. She also feels she shouldn’t be in a relationship at all right now. She doesn’t want to necessarily end our relationship, but she does want to cut back the amount of time we spend together (once a week), and how often we contact each other (daily). I really care about her, so I’m willing to continue in this way, but I can’t help but feel like I’ll end up hurt and having wasted time. Again, I COMPLETELY understand her hesitation, but it still impacts me negatively.
My question is: Is it worth continuing with this slowed down pace? If I continue working hard to prove I can be better than I was, is there a chance this could work?
TL;DR: I cheated on a girl I dated in high school. We broke up, and since then I’ve made significant improvement. However, she is still hurt by my actions and is uncomfortable with us moving at the pace we are now.
submitted by LeoLike-Lion to relationship_advice [link] [comments]


2020.12.02 04:11 FlyingFalcon6996 Questions about next steps, ADWI in NY

Hi. So let me start out by saying thanks to all in this community. I'm new here. To keep some form of anonymity I'm going to blur some details but am looking for guidance here.
I am in my late 20's, I normally live and work in NYC, in a white collar job, and getting my masters at night. Like many people, I moved home (Long Island - Suffolk) during Covid. I still have my job working from home, I moved because i thought i might as well save money living at home and my lease was over anyway.
Long story short, around thanksgiving (not on the eve or day) I went to a close family friends place, had two drinks on an empty stomach over a two hour time frame. I work long hours and sometimes i feel like i don't even have time to eat during the day, so i didn't have any breakfast or lunch that day. Well, I drove home close to my house and going around a corner that had poor lighting and hit two parked cars. I'm not sure what happened, maybe the alcohol really hit me when i was going around the corner. It was very weird as I am not a light weight and like many people have had a couple of drinks and driven home before, i guess the empty stomach thing really notched up the effects of the alcohol. No one was inside the cars i hit, but my car is most likely going to be deemed "totaled" by insurance. They hear the crash, cops called, arrested, go down to the station .18. First time ever being in trouble with the law, for anything! I have hired a high profile criminal defense attorney, who is connected and hoping to get me down to a conditional discharge. He was realistic about it and said it is a stretch with the aggravated and hitting the cars, but not impossible. I am sad, disappointed, but looking to move past this. Does anyone have any advice? I completed a MADD VIP Online, and i am enrolling in alcohol classes before my first court date (next week). I want to be doing everything i possible can to show the DA and Judge that i never want this to happen again, but realistically, to get the best possible deal I can. I figure if i do most of what a judge may ask of me for a conditional discharge in advance, it would look good. Getting my license back is a low priority for me because i will be moving back to NYC in the near future. Unfortunately, i think the evidence is stacked against me to get this dismissed or to take it to trial. I may need to travel for work when Covid is over both domestically and internationally, and i just like to travel in general, so unsupervised probation is something i really want and need. My lawyer said this may take up to 7 months, as he will fight for me until it doesn't make sense to keep beating a dead hours. I know this attorney through reputable sources (family/friends) and because of this has charged me a flat fee which I think is reasonable.

Additionally, is supervised probation going to suck? Will they test for alcohol and/or drugs (not an issue)? Will they terminate it early for a 3 year probation period if I am good in the first 6 months? 3 years sounds brutal..

TLDR: First time (A)DWI or criminal offense in NY, looking for guidance on next steps and best things to do to achieve Conditional Discharge outcome with unsupervised probation. If you prefer to DM/PM me that's totally fine as well.
submitted by FlyingFalcon6996 to dui [link] [comments]


2020.12.02 04:10 thapoofala She will be here Monday and I’m nervous!

I had an ultrasound last week Wednesday. Ultrasound tech said everything looked good size wise and I’m in the 31%.Today I had my apt with my dr. I am 37w+3d. We were talking about induction dates. I have GD so I was told I was going to be induced by 39w. I was really hoping for the 12th and they said they would be happy to try to get me in at that time. She did my strep B test and checked my cervix and said everything looked good and she just wanted to see my ultrasound results. She looks at my results and goes oh you won’t make it to the 12th. I was a little confused and said what? She said my blood pressure is too high and that she is very worried about the start of preeclampsia. She said I will need to give birth most likely by Tuesday if she doesn’t come before hand. She ordered blood tests, a urine test and another apt for Monday. The nurse then told me that they have no open apts Tuesday and I will most likely go from the drs apt Monday to the hospital to be induced. I’m super excited but also super nervous!
submitted by thapoofala to BabyBumps [link] [comments]


2020.12.02 04:10 stonerqueen1510 Am I the Arsehole for getting my mother locked up?

Hey everyone. Before I continue on with my story, I would like to just say that I’m really sorry for any grammatical errors as I am writing this on a tablet. This is my first time posting, so didn’t exactly know how else to title this story nor which sub-reddit it would go under. Also, I am so sorry for the really long post.
Back story: I (twenty two year old female) was living with my mother, Linda (not her real name) for the first twelve years of my life (with my father living with both of us for the first three years of my life before breaking up with my mother). My mother kicked me out of her home at the age of thirteen. Four days before she kicked me out of her home, I over heard her and her boyfriend at the times talking and heard her boyfriend (we'll call him Zach for the sake of this story) say and I quote “it is either me or your bitch of a child”. Yeah I know that I was not the easiest or the most well behaved kid on planet earth, but why make a MOTHER choose between her boyfriend and her CHILD, ESPECIALLY when you are a father yourself (he was sixty when my mother started dating him and she was forty five. He had two children already grown up and had their own families at this point)? Anyway, that and the next part of this story will be important later on. Whenever my mother and I would get into an argument, she would begin belting me. She would punch me, push me on to the ground and then proceeded to keep on kicking me. She would also use whips, belts, extension cords etcetera. My father would belt and punch me as well (he even gave me black eye once, but I got over that and we are closer now than what we were before), but my mother was constantly doing it instead of dealing with my behaviour in another way.
Anyways, on with the actual story.
At this particular time, it was four days after my sixteenth birthday and I had received a letter from my mother for my birthday. The letter was six pages long both front and back (not even exaggerating) about how she was “sorry for everything that she has done and that she never meant to hurt me and the if I was a better child, she would not have had to bash me or hit me at all”. She also went on to say and I quote: “ YOUR FATHER IS A LOW LIFE, LYING, PIECE OF SHIT ARSEHOLE AND I WISH HE WAS DEAD! You know, if you just would have done what you were told to do, you would still be living with me and NOT your arsehole of a father. Your father bashed me whilst I was pregnant with you, he would never do anything to help out with you, he would drink every night and always passed out in the armchair with you laying on him. He never paid for your education or ANYTHING else for you, he never bought you anything you needed or wanted nor did he ever take care of you when you were sick. He ALWAYS under minded and betrayed me whenever you were with him by giving you all the wrong foods and drinks” (my mother had me on a gluten-free, wheat free, dairy free, sugar free, preservative free, no artificial colours and or flavours etcetera diet at the time. Basically, pretty much everything had to be organic and made from scratch. I HATED it! I was still in primary school whilst this was happening and all I wanted (at the time) more than anything was to be able to eat what the other kids were eating. I was CONSTANTLY getting bullied over what I had in my lunch box and I was sick of it. I loved going to dad’s house. He would feed me whatever I wanted to eat whenever I wanted. I tried voicing my opinion about not liking the food that she was feeding me, but she never listened or just didn’t care. I tried telling the teachers and the principal that I was being bullied, but they didn’t listen; but when the other kids told the teachers that I was the one bullying them, I would be the one getting suspended from school. This carried on through year seven as well and again, the principal nor teachers did nothing about it. In fact, at the end of year seven I punched the school principal in the face breaking her nose, AFTER she CONTINUOUSLY called my aunt and the rest of dad’s side of the family fat (I tried telling her nicely a few times beforehand to stop, but she just didn’t!). She expelled me so needed up doing online schooling until the end of year ten and then left school (for reasons I don’t want to explain). Anyways, I came home from primary school one afternoon (I was inyear fe at this point) and she instantly checked my head for head lice (this was something that was done every afternoon, so nothing out of the ordinary...right?! Ohhhhh how I was wrong). She said to me after dragging me into the bathroom by my arm “I am sick of you getting head lice all the fucking time and then me having to stand here and comb them all out with head lice treatment. We are trying a new method!” and then began to pour some form of liquid on to my head. My head started instantly burning and when I told my mother this, she just said stop your whinging. It is not burning you at all, you dramatic bitch!” I turned around to see my mother pouring kerosene on to my SCALP. I yelled at her, ripping the bottle out of her hand and threw it into the bath tub. She then yelled at me saying “well, if you didn’t want kerosene poured on to your head, then you should stop getting head lice”. I was furious with her! I screamed at her, calling her every name under the sun and saying that I was NOT purposely getting head lice and that other kids at school must have them, so I must be getting head lice from them. She kept calling me names as I was trying to kick her out of the bathroom so I could shower and wash this crap out of my hair. I was washing my hair with cool water and my scalp was BURNING like crazy! I got out of the shower and called my father who was then at my mother’s place half an hour later. My father tried to come into my mother’s house, yelling at my mother “WHY IN THE FUCK DID YOU POUR KEROSENE ON MY DAUGHTER’S HEAD LINDA?! I NOW HAVE TO TAKE HER TO THE FUCKING HOSPITAL!” (my father feels physically sick whenever he walks into a hospital and he has never told me why). Zach steps in between my father and the front door, blocking him from getting in. My father then pushes Zach out of the way and storms into my bedroom, packs a few things into a bag, picks me up and then carried me down the stairs and to his truck. Unfortunately by law, I had to go back to my mother’s house after I was done at the hospital. My father and myself both tried calling the Department of Child Services but when they sent someone out, my mother denied everything and Zach backed her up her claims 100%. I even tried showing them the burns on my scalp and told them that it was chemical burns from Linda pouring kerosene on my head to kill head lice. My mother just dismissed it, told them that I accidentally had the shower way too hot and it burnt my scalp and her boyfriend backed my mother up as usual. The people from the Department of Child Services team believed my mother and said that I had a perfectly stable home with her. I told them everything from my mother beating and kicking me to her BOYFRIEND beating, kicking and throwing me around when I was getting into trouble by mother. They both denied these claims, said that I was delusional and that I was perfectly safe and fine with my mother and her boyfriend. My mother would ALWAYS tell me lies about how dad was abusive towards her, about how he would try and beat her whilst she was pregnant with me and how he tried to drown me in the toilet just to try and get rid of me when in reality, my mother was the one who was trying to get rid of me the whole time. Anyway, fast forward 22 years later and my mother comes to my apartment (I don’t know how she got my address considering I have not spoken to her in years) and she was high off her face in cocaine. I asked her what she wanted, she threw some fake arse apology to me and I told her to fuck off and slammed the door in her face. A few nights later, she came around and she was off her face yet again, threw some fake arse apology to me and begged for me to be back in her life. I told her to fuck off yet again and she was banging on my front door. I called the police, she was arrested and a few days later, the police told me that they have told her mother that my mother was sentenced to 3 months for illegal possession and usage of cocaine and my grandmother started yelling at me “YOU BITCH!! HOW COULD YOU GET YOUR OWN MOTHER LOCKED UP IN PRISON?! YOU ARE NOTHING BUT A PIECE OF SHIT HUMAN BEING!” I ended up blocking my grandmother on Facebook and don’t speak to the rest of my mother’s family. Reddit, am I the arsehole for getting my own mother locked up?
submitted by stonerqueen1510 to rSlash_YT [link] [comments]


2020.12.02 04:09 taimta31 Would it be terrible if I (20M) reach out to my ex girlfriend (19F) who I accidentally traumatized?

I (20M) dated a girl (19F) several years ago when we were 16 and 15 respectively. We were best friends for a year beforehand, and I don't think I've ever been closer to anyone in my entire life. We could talk and laugh about anything or nothing for hours, we shared secrets we'd never told anyone else, and we both knew exactly how to make the other feel loved and cared for after bad days.
We dated for a few months but it ended badly with a huge misunderstanding. We laid next to each other at a mutual friend's sleepover party one night and I was just trying to cuddle with her. I thought everything was fine and she was comfortable, but then she woke up in the middle of the night and moved away from me to a couch. It turned out she thought I was trying to feel her up in her sleep, but when I tried to explain that that wasn't what happened, she got angry and blocked me.
I was miserable, she'd meant a lot to me and I felt horrible for driving her away. So I was overjoyed when she reached out a few months after the breakup and texted me to say that she was in a bad place and needed support (she was in an abusive household). Of course I was more than happy to talk to her and help her feel less alone, it was nice to know that she valued me as much as I valued her even after what had happened, and that I was still able to help her.
But a few weeks later she texted me apologizing and saying that she couldn't stop thinking about what had happened that night and that she had to block me again for her own mental health. I was really sad once again but accepted it.
This cycle repeated three more times over the next year and a half, she'd text me when she was at rock bottom and we'd be just like normal, texting all the time for a few weeks or even months, then she'd block me again. We saw each other in person in public twice, she always avoided me and would quickly leave if she saw me.
We discussed the events of that night in detail once, I tried to explain what had happened from my point of view (I was just cuddling, stroking her stomach like my parents used to do to help me sleep at night, and if my hand ever went too high I moved it down quickly), and she told me she'd been scared and uncomfortable and felt like I was touching her inappropriately (I swear I wasn't feeling her up purposely though, I think her brain might have made it all seem far worse in the moment because she was afraid) and that my hands shouldn't have been under her shirt at all (I see now why that could've scared her, but at the time I truly thought she trusted me and was comfortable with it.)
She also explained how it had affected her mentally and how she'd had a huge breakdown and that it had brought back trauma from a previous experience where a stranger had touched her inappropriately, and that these small periods of texting me always led to her having panic attacks just because of the memory. Hearing that broke my heart, I know that I didn't mean to hurt her but intention doesn't always equal impact. A few days later she said she had to block me again.
That was two years ago, and she hasn't reached out since. I know from mutual friends that she had a serious boyfriend last year but has been single for most of 2020. I've partly moved on, but I still think about her all the time and wonder if she thinks about me too. I hope she doesn't because I know it brings her stress, but I also just really miss her. Especially because this year has been really hard for me and I feel like she's the only person who could make me feel better.
I really want to text her just to check up on her and see if she'd be open to talking. I know she's probably better off without me, but part of me feels like she'd understand. She always texted me when she was struggling, I just want to do the same. Would that be a bad idea?
TLDR: I accidentally traumatized my ex girlfriend 4 years ago. We've texted occasionally since, but it's been 2 years since I've heard from her. We had an undeniably special bond, I really miss her and could use her support right now, would it be bad of me to reach out to her?
submitted by taimta31 to relationships [link] [comments]


2020.12.02 04:08 helptheyfoundme A timeline of pansexuality (CW: Slurs used in context are not censored)

I ran up against this carrd today and I was wondering if we could have a discussion about it. I know I learned a lot of interesting new things about the label I use to identify. It's a long carrd (please read it all for full context), so I chose some dates from each page that were interesting to me. I appreciate that this source seems to be unbiased in that it lists both the good and the bad of the label (it is written by a pansexual however, so it is not completely unbiased). I also like that they have given definitions based on academic, medical, political, and social contexts. I was especially surprised by the mentions of the journal Anything That Moves, as I've always been given the resource as a way to downplay my own label. I was also surprised by just how closely my label is tied to the punk and glam rock eras. You can find the links to resources quoted in the carrd timeline itself.

In the book, The Downtown Pop Underground, about the New York City culture in the '60s-'70s credited the so-called pansexuality of the glitteglam rock movement to Jackie Curtis and makes a David Bowie comparison, who also has been described as pansexual in this context. "In addition to developing a now-ubiquitous pansexual style, Curtis anticipated punk's DIY fashions by wearing ripped thrift store clothes that were safety-pinned together." and "'What Jackie did was more like performance art,' Melba LaRose said. 'I never thought of him as a woman. He went back and forth so many times.'" and "'That was the beginning of pansexuality, and David Bowie picked up on that,' said Tony Zanetta, who worked with the glam rock singer. 'I find a lot of similarities between Jackie Curtis and David Bowie.'"
In the fourth issue of bisexual magazine Anything That Moves, in 1992, Mykel Board wrote in to say, among other things, that he "prefers pansexual". And Kory Martin-Damon discussed; "alternative lifestyles are also almost nonexistent in sci-fi. I do not speak only of homosexuality. I speak of pansexuality, polyfidelity, bisexuality, and even asexuality."
In 1999, Anne Killpack wrote an editorial in the 19th issue of the bisexual magazine Anything That Moves about labels. In it, she stated, "whether you call yourself bisexual, polysexual, multisexual, pansexual, me-sexual or refuse to be labeled altogether, if you are like me and find people attractive regardless of their sex or gender, then we need you."
An article in The Advocate in 2001 discussed the rise in people identifying as pansexual, and labels other than lesbian. The author of the article looked down on those labels, which they described as being modern, because they interpreted them as implying older labels are passe; "Hey, c'mon, it's modern. Anyways, unity was our theme! Still, as talk of trannies and p*nnies excited the crowd, I felt compelled to interject a warning against the fashionable labels that seem to imply our old ways of being are just passe." Note: this is the oldest use of "p*nnie" [not censored in original but it wouldn't let me post otherwise] I have come across
The 2002 "i am pansexual" LiveJournal is said to have coined the term pansexual, created the modern meaning of pansexual, and been the first use of "all genders" as the definition of pansexual, and if you've read this far, you know not a single one of those is true. The definition of pansexual given in the first post would have been fine if it stopped at "pansexuals love people of all genders", but it unfortunately went on to say bisexuality doesn't include transgender or non-binary people.
In 2007, the pansexual Wikipedia page was adjusted to, "Pansexuality (sometimes referred to as omnisexuality) is a sexual/affectional orientation characterized by a potential aesthetic attraction, romantic love and/or sexual desire for people of any sex or gender", and then shortly changed to "the potential for aesthetic attraction, romantic love and/or sexual desire for people regardless of their gender identity or biological sex". Noting the shift from the previous use of "for anybody" to "people of any sex or gender" to "regardless of gender or sex".
Encyclopedia of Contemporary LGBTQ Literature of the United States, 2009, mentioned how bisexuality was redefined to mean attraction to more than one gender, but that others have opted for terms such as "multisexual, omnisexual, or pansexual to call attention to the limitless number of genders to which one can be emotionally, physically, sexually, or spiritually attracted".
Shiri Eisner posted a bisexual umbrella image in 2011, which included terms such as pansexual, omnisexual, polysexual, fluid, queer, bi-curious, homoflexible/lesbiflexible, and and heteroflexible. An "other bi+ identities" categories also included terms such as biromantic, panromantic, bisensual, pansensual, bidyke, byke, bisexual-lesbian, ambisextrous, anthrosexual, multisexual, genderblind, pomosexual, and "many more".
A 2013 research paper investigating different aspects of pansexual self-identification within contemporary online communities showed "the multiple and fluid identification observed suggests that respondents viewed their sexual identification as an ongoing process, rather than a fixed and finished part of their self" and "respondents considered 'the ability and willingness to be attracted to all genders and sexes' as the most important aspect of their pansexual identification and 'past behaviour' and 'political reasons' as the weakest aspects" and "while some respondents suggested that pansexuality was a sexual orientation that saw beyond genders and sexes, others suggested that it was a sexual orientation that was defined by attraction to all genders and sexes, as opposed to viewing them as irrelevant".
An Everyday Feminism article from 2015 that answered the question "aren't bisexuality and pansexuality the same thing?" defined pansexuality and bisexuality as "attraction to any and all genders, thereby panning the entire gender spectrum (pan also means 'all'). Bisexuality typically refers to attraction to two or more genders" and ultimately concludes that what bisexual and pansexual mean depends on the person; some use them differently, some use them interchangeably, and we should "allow people to tell you how they identify and never label anyone as bisexual or pansexual without asking them first".
A non-binary trans person broke down the bi vs pan debate in the 2015 article "Cis Privilege and Identity Policing in the Bi and Pan Community". The article stated "pansexuality as an identity was originally formed for folks to specifically include recognizing attraction to non-binary people. Bisexuality responded to allegations of transphobia by clarifying that the definition of bisexuality isn't always limited to attraction to men and women. Accusations of transphobia on both sides ensued." and explained further how pansexual was a way to include non-binary people during a time when they were "even less widely recognized" and "much of the bi community defined itself as people who were attracted to men and women" but that not all of the bi movement was using that definition and how they too were actively challenging transphobia and exclusion.The article concluded with "all of the problems brought up by bi and pan people are real problems. But they aren't limited to only these two communities. Transphobia is an issue across the board." and suggests we be trans inclusive by being clear with the language we use, calling out transphobia to support trans people not to use trans people as a "political football" to devalue someone else's orientation, and affirming identities instead of policing them.
In 2018, the hashtag #DropTheB went around and pansexual people got blamed for it, when in reality it was 4chan/Alt Right trolls wanting to create tension and fighting in the community, specifically between bisexual and pansexual people, as the 4chan screenshots show the use of "LGPT" instead of "LGBT".
bigbunnyenergy on Twitter shared their experience with pansexual being adopted as a label, "I love that the bi community accounts for attraction to trans and nb ppl. But you know what my first experience with bi ppl was? Numerous forum posts and blogs either expressing disgust towards trans folks or fetishizing us. Back then, saying you were pan was a response to actual transphobia that was present in the bi community! Discomfort identifying with a community that ostracized you isn’t bigoted, and we need to stop pretending it’s not a nuanced discussion deeply rooted in personal experience."A similar account was shared by Assistant2Snout on Twitter, "nb transwoman here that has identified as pan for 20+ years. the prevalence of 'pansexual' was literally spearheaded by trans people because of their regular experiences of transphobia from bisexual peers during a time where being out even slightly was terrifying and dangerous. the label was helpful in making many trans people feel safeunderstood and making it clear who was safe... you may not understand it now with how much transphobia in the bisexual community has been called out and amended at this point, but calling 'pan' transphobic is both ahistorical and an affront to trans people everywhere that had to deal with some very hard and dark times... VERY glad that generally people go with the org definitions of bi /now/, but org definitions are not lived history and literally knew no one that knew them at those times. so please /do not/ start trying to create more hate about a label you obviously don't understand the history of at the expense of other trans people. to say a label trans and nb people picked up and helped spread, to have something that feels clearer and safer for them, is 'transphobic' only serves to rekindle a lot of fears again.
FelixMarques on Twitter also shared a similar account of pansexual becoming an identity label, "The reason trans & NB people developed 'pansexuality' in the 70s is precisely that they needed an explicitly non-transphobic word. It took to the 90s for the Bisexual Manifesto to address that. This history can't be erased."
This is only a small sampling of the long long l o n g timeline of the word pansexual. If you identify as any bi+ or mspec identities, I highly suggest you read this!
What did you learn? How has this changed you perspective? Let's have a conversation!
submitted by helptheyfoundme to BiVsPanDebate [link] [comments]


2020.12.02 04:02 No-While-8919 Should I still ask for a reference?

So I matched with a Tinder guy a month ago and we went on a date. During that date, I would say I enjoyed my time with him and he mentioned he was working at a company that he was willing to refer me if I wanted to work there. I don't know if he was telling the truth or not but he did text back after the date saying he's hoping to meet up for other dates. Then the messages just sort of died and he apologized for being busy with school (masters) and a full-time job and said that he will get back to me to go out on another date and shared some locations he wanted to go with me. (This was two weeks ago)
The last we texted was a week ago where I was left hanging with no reply where I mostly initiated most of the conversations. This week I found a position available that I am highly interested in at the company he's working at on LinkedIn and LinkedIn suggested me to add him as a friend which I did and he accepted. I'm in the dilemma of not knowing If I should ask him for a reference or not since we haven't been talking.
submitted by No-While-8919 to relationship_advice [link] [comments]


2020.12.02 04:02 TiocfaidhArLa72 Tom Messick & Fred Drumm Missing 411 Cases - Whitehall, NY Sasquatch Sightings

I'm no Internet sleuth, but I am very intrigued with the entire world of Missing 411 Cases, especially those involving veteran outdoorsmen like Hunters, Hikers and the like. My heart just breaks for these families who's loved ones simply vanish into thin air. There's so many possibilities and theories, they are endless. I often wonder what each of the victims were thinking when whatever happened to them occurred....it must have been sheer terror
Anyway, here I am watching the Beast of Whitehall Documentary. It delves into a series of Bigfoot sightings in Whitehall, NY in 1976. Not 1 or 2 sightings in a single day, rather dozens and dozens of sightings over the course of a couple weeks. At least 6-7 Law Enforcement Officers witnessed what they referred to as Bigfoot, high school teens, 30-40 year old men and women.....basically all types of people from all sorts of age groups during all times of the day.
These Cases were investigated as best as possible for 1976, and the town of Whitehall suddenly became the unofficial Bigfoot Capital of the World.....NY Tourism Board advertises it. Even though 1976 was the epicenter for Bigfoot Sightings, these Beings have been sighted in the Lake George / Whitehall Area every year since then....dozens of documented sightings and even more that go undocumented.
This is what brings me to the point of my Post.....Whitehall, NY is 42 Miles away from Horicon, NY......what is the significance of Horicon, NY??? It is where Tom Messick literally vanished without a trace during his annual hunting trip in 2015!! In fact, if you draw a straight line between Whitehall and Horicon it is 20 miles.....only separated by Lake George!
Now add in the Fred Drumm disappearance from Schuylerville, NY only 10 days after Mr.Messick disappeared, and the entire M411 world and Sasquatch/Other Cryptid connection just got a whole lot more real.....now everyone can understand why the FBI may have had such an interest, and been eager to investigate the Messick & Drumm Disappearances.....the FBI was notified and on scene during the Whitehall Sightings in 1976....
Have Psychics or Mediums ever been used with the M411 Cases?
For reference - Whitehall to Horicon to Schuylerville, NY by highway is 98 miles....again, BY HIGHWAY...if you are some sort of mysterious Being, you'll be cutting thru Forest, meaning that 98 mile is a whole lot less.....These points sorta make a triangle....could it be a possible migratory route of ....The Lake George Triangle.....like I said, I'm no professional but Ive always been pretty good at common sense and piecing things together. I'm sure there's a Database on disappearances in the Lake George Area....I wonder How Many disappearances and what the circumstances were at the time of each.
Records show the Native Americans of the Adirondacks called the Sasquatch Being the Gougou" and there are supposedly journal writings from a French explorer describing a Sasquatch encounter dating to 1603.....
I have plotted these Towns on a Map but can't paste it online :(.....it's concerning to say the least
Horicon
Whitehall
Schuylerville
submitted by TiocfaidhArLa72 to Missing411 [link] [comments]


2020.12.02 03:59 throwuhaway1029 Can a long term relationship work with vastly different sex drives

Sorry for any typos or if it seems kind of all over the place, writing this on my mobile.
TL; DR Me and my gf have vastly different sex drives in an otherwise perfect relationship. I find this very frustrating but fear it'll only get worse as time goes on considering acknowledgement of the issue by both of us yet no real solution or compromise.
So I (m26) have been dating my gf (f24) for about 3 years. When we first started dating we had a lot of sex, as a lot of couples do. After a while it started to decline. I didn't think anything of it, everyone has a lot of sex in the beginning, I figured things would taper off a bit. Around that time I feel like our sex life actually improved since we were starting to share and learn more about each other's specifics likes and dislikes. The frequency wasn't quite what I would really want, but I understand I have a high sex drive and was still more than happy with the amount, especially with the added quality.
However as time went on the frequency declined, and has continued to decline all the way to the present. At first I thought I might be the issue (like she lost her attraction to me or something) considering that she continued to masturbate almost every night before bed. I thought that if she could masturbate often enough and at one time have sex at a much higher frequency, the problem must be me.
I had confronted her about this to which she told me it was more to get to sleep then sexual, which I can understand and that comforted me somewhat. I expressed that there's still some sexuality to it, and had previously told her that watching her touch herself was a link so we (mostly me) came up with mutual masturbation to help fill the lack of sex. It ends up really just being two people masturbating next to each other. There's no involvement, she just does her thing while I jerk off next to her. Which is still fine sometimes, and I can enjoy but she never looks at me or touches me when she does it, just does her thing regardless of me and passes out. Again, I'd have no problem if this was most of the time but it's every time.
We've had multiple talks about the lack of sex, and she acknowledges that it's gotten less frequent over time. She's basically expressed that she lacks a sex drive for the most part and doesn't even think about it that often. Which I have no reason to not believe her, I think she's telling the truth, I absolutely trust her. But I have a hard time wrapping my head around it having a high sex drive and considering the frequency of masturbating (even if it's to get to sleep) and the frequency we've had sex in the past. For perspective in the beginning it was like 4-5 days a week, with multiple sessions a day or night(didn't expect that forever, new relationship sex) which then became 1-3 times a week (I could have sex every day but this i could be more than happy with and was when it was happening) but now it has gotten to the point where it's mayyyybe once a month.
I've tried getting her to tell me what could help get her in the mood and expressed that I'd have no judgement for what ever it is, I'd be willing to do it. Whether it was reading erotica to her or by herself first, using some kind of porn, role playing, any specific kind of foreplay, anything. She'll just tell me she doesn't know, which again I have no reason to not believe her, but I can't wrap my ahead around the fact that at 24 you don't know what turns you on. Which makes me think that she just doesn't want to tell me. Especially considering she does watch porn sometimes so there's got to be something in what she watches that she enjoys. Plus if she does watch porn it's usually when I'm it around. She says she has to be in the mood for it, which is fair and I honestly wouldn't mind if she watched it with out me if it wasn't for the fact that anytime she does, it's like her allotment of sex for the day, and whatever drive she had for sex that day is gone. She could watch it and masturbate all day without me, I wouldn't care, I just wish that if she could get in the mood for porn she could for me.
I've suggested that we try just some foreplay and if it goes anywhere cool, and if not no big deal. It worked once and that was about it. She usually just doesn't go along with it. If I ever start kissing any more passionately then a peck I just get a closed mouth and pursed lips, so I rarely try anymore, and she's never kissed me passionately unless we are already initiated in sex.(or early in the relationship)
On one hand I don't want to be pushy, but we're extremely open about everything else and I've told her every kink and desire I have, so I kinda feel annoyed that if this is the case(her not knowing what turns her on) that she feels like she couldn't tell me. On the other hand though, I have no reason to doubt her so I'll just accept that she doesn't know.
I've acknowledged that I can ask too often, and I get that can be annoying. So I know I can also improve. I will say that she's tried to help fill the void with oral and handjobs which I absolutely love and appreciate. So I do have to give her credit, it does seem like she's trying. But it's still not that often, more often then how often we have sex but still.
However as time has gone on I've realized that what I'm really missing is intimacy. Don't get me wrong we cuddle and lay together plenty, and I think for her that's intimate enough. But for me I need sex with it. She needs to be stress free to be in the mood (which anytime I can tell she's really stressed, I try not to initiate or ask), however for me it's a huge stress reliever. And for me part of intimacy is feeling desired, wanted, and sexy. 9 out of 10 times I'm the one who initiates, and when she does initiate it's just a verbal hey do you want to? Like I feel like she's in the mood and I happen to be there, not that I'm the one she actually wants. Even for oral or a handjob (not that I would expect to never have to ask,) but she's never offered on her own or just started to. Again I would not expect that she should do it all the time with out being asked, but being surprised once and a while would go a long way. For me it just feels like she's doing it just to do it. She says she does it to make me happy, which I do need to appreciate more, but even off it's not every time, I want her to do it because she wants to for herself. I would happily give oral or use my hands without any expectation of reciprocation (if she was ever in the mood to let me), and be more than happily content.
So what I really find missing is that I want to feel wanted the same way I want her. I just want to feel desired. Every thing else in our relationship is perfect and I absolutely love her, I can easily see myself with her for life. In fact I want to spend my life with her. But as time has gone on this has bothered me more and more. And now it hurts me because I can't stop thinking that what if this is just the way it is and we just aren't sexually compatible? And if we aren't sexually compatible what are my options? Just to accept it and find some way to cope? Or does this mean that long term isn't for us?
submitted by throwuhaway1029 to relationship_advice [link] [comments]


2020.12.02 03:51 Outrageous-Reveal-21 I’ve got the single woman blues. Feeling super down today.

I’ve got the single woman blues. Feeling super down today.
What would you say to a woman who has never been loved?
Just wanted to be very honest because this has been bothering me for a long time. I struggle on occasion when the thoughts come up.
I’ve wanted to be in a relationship since I was very young (probably since I was 10, maybe even younger) but love has never happened for me. I was quite shy as a child. In school, there were boys I liked, but they always ignored me and I was teased. A really awkward time (but elementary, middle and high school are usually like that)
College was tough. There was a guy who I was very much infatuated with but he turned out to be a huge bully. He spread rumors about me to everyone he knew and many of his friends were always making rude remarks when I walked by (yes, imagine these people were over the age of 18). It was humiliating.
Then in graduate school I befriended a guy who I immediately began crushing on. He knew all along how I felt about him and kept me around because he really liked how much attention I gave him while he was seeing other girls. I don’t know why I stayed in the “friendship”. It was going on for 4 years. Until it got to the point when my feelings were so overwhelming that I could not stand being around him. So I confessed to him how I felt about him as a release for me. Naturally, I was rejected. I asked for space and we never spoke again. He stopped talking to all my friends too. Sure, it was gutsy but also humiliating, facing rejection once again.
I finished school and am back home now living with my parents. There was a family who was interested in me meeting their son but they retracted their proposal (I know, a very old fashioned way of doing things) because I was unemployed.
Romance was never in the picture for me. Absolutely no luck in that department. I stood on the sidelines, while all my friends and many other young women my age were chosen by great guys. They were always noticed and approached anytime we went out. I felt overlooked, invisible, unwanted, undesired, unattractive. I know one must not put their worth in someone else’s approval. As a woman though, it’s been a very painful experience for me. To experience rejection time and time again. There hasn’t been a guy out there who has ever asked me out, taken the time to get to know me or want to invest in me. It’s the worst feeling in the world. Even more so because I am a romantic at heart. I’ve longed to know the intimacy of a significant other. All these years, it’s never happened. I’m now 27. Sometimes I feel like a lost cause.
But then there are times when I enjoy my singleness. It’s all I’ve ever known, and, spending it with the Lord and my family has made this time valuable. I have time for passion projects, other hobbies, investing in close friendships. These carefree moments will never come back again and I’m trying to make the most of them.
I also never wanted to be THAT girl. Yes, the girl who serial dates and is ALWAYS in a relationship and can’t be on her own for more than a month. I have close friends who are like this.
But this still doesn’t detract from the fact that I want to be loved and wanted in a romantic way. I’ve never known the feeling. I’ve longed to know what it would be like to have my feelings reciprocated, or for someone to want to pursue me. I was sad because I felt (and still do at times) that no man wanted me. Of course it’s not true but if it’s never happened before (plus the bullying, heartache, countless rejections), but, what else was I supposed to think? It affected my self-esteem, I’m ashamed to say. It’s hard when you see some girls get all the guys. Everywhere they walk, they catch a man’s attention. It’s never been the case for me.
I’ve always wondered that feeling, the moment you catch someone’s attention and he really fancies you. That he will do anything to pursue you. That he tells all of his family and friends about you, because that’s how awesome and amazing he thinks you are.
Every Valentine’s Day, I spend with my family (and the same thing will happen this year, and I’ll be ok with that). When I was at school, I spent it on my own, ordering in a delicious meal and watching a movie or spending it catching up with a close friend. But never with a man who loves me. Never had a secret admirer either.
I don’t even know what I’m asking. God always says He has a plan. It’s very hard waiting. Marriage is a challenge in itself. It takes a lot of hard work. I often wonder what it’s like to be on the other side. I often wonder about companionship in a mate. After all, God designed helpmeets for us.
I’ve known many women who are well into their 40s and still haven’t met the right one. They are still single and wish to be married. They feel lonely as many of their friends and peers are coupled up. I’m very scared at such a prospect. I distinctly remember when I was in high school, my drama teacher at the time (who was such a kind lady), had mentioned how hard it was for her being in her mid 40s, watching her married friends enjoy their lives while she couldn’t even get a date. This is a sad reality for many women. What can you even say?
It truly is out of my hands.
submitted by Outrageous-Reveal-21 to dating_advice [link] [comments]


2020.12.02 03:50 alaskansteve It’s Happening..?

We are entering the biblical times promised by Q and Sidney Powell (SP). Some ENORMOUS but unverified news items, but with credible sources. SO AWESOME !
First of all, I know many reading this are nervous, worried, etc. but I PROMISE you libs are WAY more scared about what is coming. Their actions are a give away. The fraud is absolutely everywhere.
I have to give libs credit for two things. One, they were thorough. If there was an avenue for possible fraud, they took it and ran with it. Two, if the fraud was against Pedo Joe and for Trump, they would be rioting in the streets LIKE WE SHOULD BE DOING! Libs don't accept defeat as we typically do. They fight with their limp wristed hair pulling, girly slaps and shrill high pitch shrieks, but they fight nonetheless. I keep saying, don't get sad, get MAD as it is a far more productive emotion.
Now that the fraud is apparent, their goal has switched to hiding it from the world and destroying the evidence. CodeMonkey (CM) was all over this saying they would try to steal the servers from the warehouse in GA, and he urgently asked for people to volunteer to watch the building ‪24/7‬. That still didn't stop the theft as two unmarked trucks showed up and took away a server despite a court order against this.
DON'T worry. Remember we have 20,000+ military intel agents working covertly on this. Do you really think that they did not foresee this? I am sure they tracked the truck and are going to round up ALL guilty suspects. CM also posted a video of someone with their phone outside a voting center trying to hook up to Wi-Fi, (links will be in the comment section) and the options that came up showed every single voting machine had a dedicated Wi-Fi. 100% ILLEGAL. CM is asking people to repeat this by getting close to where the machines are stored and trying to connect to Wi-Fi.
Kemp is an absolute traitor. We are watching liberal republican governors committing treason in the open in full view almost as if it was ritual suicide. Kemp was busted in 2017 for trying to wipe the servers of voting machines as he just tried to do again. For the Senate run off, he just approved mail in ballots, drop boxes, and all the other fraud venues used the first time. Do they think they won't be caught AGAIN? They want two decades in jail instead of one?
Perhaps my favorite story of the day is the liberal repub governor of AZ who just signed his own arrest warrant. Giuliani was holding a meeting in AZ about the fraud in that state. He asked one of his witnesses to state his credentials, and he STARTED (link in comments) by saying he has four degrees from MIT, then had a laundry list of achievements that went on for two full minutes. He then showed that the ONLY way for Pedo Joe to "win" the state was for Pedo Joe to get 130% of the vote past a certain time, and for Trump to get a negative 30%. Literally impossible, and yet while this guy was showing fraud without a shadow of a doubt along with dozens of other witnesses, the governor certified the election. He literally KNOWINGLY certified a fraudulent election thereby getting him a decade in prison and making him ineligible for office for life. BRILLIANT, and I absolutely love it. Some of the other testimony includes a worker saying they received BOXES of ballots every day AFTER the election for ten consecutive days. The election month. Another person said the signatures that were allowed weren't even close to matching their records. This article highlights just a few of the alarming things brought forth in the case filed in GA. (link in comments) 5 million votes are now being questioned in Mexifornia. SP posted on PARLER a pictures of boxes of ballots being transported in a civilian truck which is a felony.
Despite ALL of this, they are losing, and they know it. * They can no longer deny the fraud, but they are trying. Now they are trying to intimidate people stepping forth. * A poll watcher who testified to the rampant fraud she saw was greeted unexpectedly at her home by some goons from the DoJ. Testifying is now a criminal act according to the treasonous DoJ. * Cryin' Schumer is now demanding that Pedo Joe's cabinet members get approval BEFORE the inauguration. * Geraldo Rivera said Trump should stop fighting. * The media is lauding Pedo Joe's comm team saying it is the first all female team. Kayleigh McEllaney responded that it is the first all female comm team since Trump's all female comm team, Pence's all female team, etc. * Twitter just suspended one of the people who testified to the fraud in AZ. * A liberal online media outlet called for the "incarceration and humiliation" of all Trump supporters.
They truly believe if they say something, it somehow becomes reality. These are the acts of truly desperate people. Does this sound like the things people who are in control would say and do?
Wikipedia banned NewsMax, just because. EPA employees are over joyed thinking the steal is in and are now going into full sedition mode "resisting" the Trump policies meaning not doing the job they are paid to do and performing their own mini-coup which will lead to a purge of the entire EPA.
What else do libs control? Lockdowns. They are wanting people to suffer, and there is a more nefarious motivation here. People HATE the lockdowns. A new study showed people crave social interaction as much they hunger for food. This means they will get desperate to end the suffering. That means they will sign onto mandatory vaccines if it means ending the lockdowns which I think is the intended purpose at this point. Of course, NONE of these politicians actually believe this virus is a threat. This article (link in comments) compiles all the politicians who ended Thanksgiving for their constituents who had their entire family fly in for the holiday.
There is a new Cry Babies doll (brand name) that is covered in red dots until little Sophia injects her with a shot that makes the red dots disappear. Indoctrination 101. An LA supervisor banned all outdoor eating in LA, then went to a restaurant and had dinner outside. These are EVIL people. These are the sorts of things the royalty would do in Europe before a revolution and beheadings. Yet we tolerate it.
Don't forget a court in the EU ruled the PCR test is 97% inaccurate. The CDC showed that the "overwhelming" majority of people getting infected were wearing masks which shows they do NOTHING. The X22 guy gave a great analogy about masks. He said it's like being told to wear a jacket then go into a room full of radiation, don't worry the jacket protects you. Wouldn't you want to see proof? Does it work when you take it off to eat? Does it work if you take it off to riot? This is literally what the sheeple are doing. But the best beat down came from Tucker. (link in comments)
Here's a "shock". Now that the elections are over Fascist Fauxci said kids should be going to school which is what Trump said in June. What changed? Oh yeah, he thinks Pedo Joe won. Tucker absolutely destroys him.
Businesses are now calling themselves something they aren't For example, a church in LA is labeling itself as a strip club since those can stay open while churches can't. By the way, billionaires have made TRILLIONS during the pandemic as they get all the business that the closed small businesses would have otherwise received. Amazing Polly is baffled by the fact that for the first time in history we let the fearful and weak dictate to the healthy and strong what to do. Her point is valid.
What's next? Do we ban dogs because soy riddled libs are scared of dogs? Does society collapse to cater to the fears of isolated individuals? The ONLY thing driving CV-19 at this point is fear with policy being dictated by the scientifically illiterate. Plus, it's complete fraud. Did you know that right now during peak flu season there were only 41 cases of the flu across the entire country? Yeah, right.
Back on task, ALL of this is evidence of liberal fear. Fear of losing what they stole. A poll showed an incredible 82% of Pedo Joe voters have no idea what the issues are, and get their "news" almost exclusively from social media. That is a threat to nat'l security. Interestingly, all of the flags and warnings these monopolies are putting on Trump's posts are having the opposite of their intended affect. People are now more trusting of Trump and looking up the info themselves after the flagging according to a recent survey. Makes sense. What is the forbidden fruit? Plus, getting flagged by these Nazis is pretty much a badge of honor and authenticity at this point.
What are the people who are in actual control saying? The official people are getting more and more aggressive in their tone. Lin Wood (LW) said we need to do our homework listing four things to do. It's a list of things to educate yourself about and to share, but what is interesting is he mentioned what Lincoln did in 1861. He took absolute control in what many people to this day call an act of tyranny.
LW said all the lies will be revealed, but he said the following nations were bad actors. China, Russia, Cuba, Venezuela, Cuba, Mexico, Germany, and Spain. It goes WAY beyond China and Iran. This is an international criminal cabal attacking our country. He then mentioned specific names saying people worked to steal the election including Pedo Joe, the Fuhrer, Clinton, Stoner Dorsey, Robot Zuck, Eugenicist Gates, Kemp and the Sec'y of State of GA. He said 80% of dems and 60% of repubs are criminals, something I think is entirely accurate. He said the GREAT REVEAL is coming.
How about this; LW asked who is "the John Roberts" listed on the Epstein Island flight logs! That was a MESSAGE to the treasonous satanic pedophile chief justice.
General McInery took it much further than that. He said this is collusion to commit treason and that Trump should suspend habeas corpus, invoke the insurrection act then have mass arrests. He said this is the biggest cyber warfare attack on the country in history. He said Pedo Joe absolutely knew about this. This is what the people who have access to the real data are saying. What about the unofficial people?
This is where it gets so good that you should be like this. Interestingly, one of the guys said two days ago he was hearing that Pedo Joe was looking to find someone to SURRENDER to to get a plea deal for him and his family. This would involve him immediately withdrawing from the race and confessing to the fraud. The next day Marine One stops by Pedo Joe's house, then he is in a boot. Word is he went to Mitch McConnell knowing Trump would not be forgiving, and is asking for a pardon for him and his family. Supposedly, the White House is mulling it over or altering the deal. This is ANOTHER PATH to victory that I didn't consider. We keep hearing that as people are facing jail time and people are getting arrested, people are turning on the traitors. The low level peons don't want to go to jail for their superiors. I have been asking for years when does self preservation take over. One of the guys reporting this said WEEKS ago that he heard Pedo Joe would be arrested before January. This scenario takes it completely out of the hands of the Supreme Court.
That then leaves the Congressional races to be sorted out, and once the fraud is ADMITTED to, nothing can stop what they decide to do. Certified elections means jail time for the guilty. All of this is just innuendo, right? How about the fact that he CHINESE MEDIA is reporting this is true (video mid article)? I have done this long enough to have a sense of what is legit and what is not, and this smells like the truth from all angles.
It gets better. The anons are all over the fact that Gina Haspel, traitor and CIA director, hasn't been seen or heard from in weeks. It really comes down to two scenarios which are out there. Pretty much everyone agrees she was a "casualty" during the raid in Germany, the question is was she killed or captured. If she is captured, she is in Gitmo facing what will likely be execution or turn over everything you have for life in prison instead. Want more fun? Cindy McStain is now in a foot boot/cast. Not a coincidence.
But here is the CROWN JEWEL. (There will be supplementary info for this in a separate post, other links in comments tonight)
A conservative website based in Canada which sticks to mainstream stories and does NOT engage in conspiracy topics posted this article saying the Fuhrer was arrested Sunday! (link in comments) The charge was for espionage sending military intel to China and came after one of the 210,000 sealed indictments was unsealed. The judge imposed a media blackout, but as the author states, since they are Canadian, this doesn't affect them, and Spanish channels are reporting the same thing! The article has quotes from two high ranking attorneys, and an assistant director of the FBI's counter intelligence agency. There are quotes from FBI agents working in the Honolulu division. The one man sleeper cell from Kenya (his own words) hasn't been seen or tweeted since the date. (Think of all the body doubles we have seen like Hillary after the van toss, fake hunter Biden and others)
This entire article WREAKS of authenticity, and Q said the first arrest would "shock the world". Is THIS the moment we have been praying for? I sure as hell hope so!
ALL of this explains why they never swapped out Pedo Joe for Bike Mike (Moochelle).
https://i.imgflip.com/4ogtbj.jpg
The candidate didn't matter if you were willing to commit to 40 million fraudulent ballots.
Anticlimactic misc items. * MItt Romney's son has been tied Dominion and Smartmatic, and you can thank the anons for digging that up. * Dominion was paid $400 million by a Swiss bank account that tracks back to China. * Remember when I said the 46 year old former CEO of Zappos died? He didn't just die. Someone poured gasoline on him then set him on fire. He died nine days later. He was tied to the THORN pedophile group I linked yesterday. TRULY EVIL people. * In order for a company to be on the NASDAQ going forward, they have to have a minority or a LBGT member on their board. * It's a shakedown but not nearly as severe as what the nation's largest realtor union is doing. Anyone "guilty" of posting conservative content on their personal accounts can be removed and have their livelihood taken away. THIS is what libs do. Bully and silence people. This is 100% illegal, but it will silence people. * High schools are about to go woke all over the country as the leftist radical indoctrination gets more aggressive as school after school signed on to a radical program. I consider this a nat'l emergency and the single greatest long term threat to the country. This is the gestation phase of future Pantifa members. * The World Economic Forum submitted a memo telling starving nations they need to learn to eat weeds, then gave a bullet point presentation as to why. Gotta love the globalist overlords.
submitted by alaskansteve to Conservativelifestyle [link] [comments]


2020.12.02 03:50 matosz The Nostalgia Series - 250 ~ The Legend of Sun Knight (FIN)

The Legend of Sun Knight

The pantheon of gods!! Where every deity is a mob-boos-like existence fighting for territory and influence. But direct confrontations would break the world into pieces, so the fight is undertaken by the many, many religions this world features. And who in the whole world doesn't know about the Church of the God of Light? And by association, about the Knights and their 'peculiar' characteristics, which are seemingly passed down from generation to generation of Knights without a single deviation? And who in the world doesn't know about the Captain of the Knights, the one closest to the GoL on the planet, the Sun Knight, and his undying devotion, a smile forever plastered on his face?
And so we follow the story of the 38th generation of knights, and the story of the Sun Knight and his 'devotion' towards the church, always helping his fellow knights, because that's just what he must and what he will do, no matter what he has to lose. Is this a story of fun-times, sunshine and rainbows? Or will the Sun Knight experience struggles on his path? Let's find out!!!
This novel's volume one is an absolute masterpiece. Long ago I stopped after reading said volume, because I was literally, physically hurting. My sides couldn't take it. The absurdity of the situation, all to maintain the façade. Man, the novel is excellent, just going from volume 1 alone. Yet, not everything is sunshine and rainbows. Grisia loses so, so much. I need to re-read this novel and I'll do it after finishing Genius Doctor.
This is actually a very old translation which began on 2010 and ended (main story) on 2015. There are many side stories for those who wanted more, and I consider the translation to be of very high quality, at least it makes sense.
I had some trouble choosing how to end the Nostalgia Series. Do I go with a popular novel? I thought of RMJI being the final one. Or do I go with the EN novel prequel to the very first Nostalgia, being The Gemstone Chronicles? Or do I just pick one at random? In the end, after checking every novel left, I just decided to end it with a novel which is not very well known nowadays, but I am 100% convinced is the truest Nostalgia featured to date. I love this novel. It's awesome through and through and a great way to invest your time. Because reading The Legend of Sun Knight is a time investment, not wasting.
Have you read this novel before? Did you drop it at some point? Really? What's wrong with you? Did you complete it? What do you remember from it? Leave a comment below!
Welcome to The Nostalgia Series! I've been planning this since August last year as a way to inject a little bit of discussion around here while at the same time going on a trip through memory lane. Sadly my self-excuse was having too little time and have been putting this off for months now. But on April 18 decided 'screw it' and to start by just keeping it simple.
So here is simple. I will post an entry with a short or a long summary in a daily basis for every single novel in my now short reading list. Including and starting with the novels I dropped and going up the ladder. If you'd like, join the discussion! And hopefully you may find something new to read. Anyways, let's talk.
Links
submitted by matosz to noveltranslations [link] [comments]


2020.12.02 03:49 Edge5880 She (22f) and I (24m) were friends for years then love complicated everything

I’ve known her since High School. We used to study together, laugh, sing, comfort each other at our lowest points. Then my best friend told me she had feelings for me so I invited her on a date. We got together and it was magical but then things changed and everything became so difficult (talking to her had been so easy then it became a stress filled nightmare) she then started playing games/being hot and cold then everything fell apart. We broke-up but It felt like I had lost a piece of myself. We bumped into each other at our old Coffee Shop hangout and started talking again and it seemed like old times then she started being (hot and cold, playing games) I just want to ask her point blank “Why” and that I want things to go back where they were. I just don’t know what to do.
submitted by Edge5880 to askwomenadvice [link] [comments]


2020.12.02 03:46 Edge5880 She (22f) and I (24m) were friends for years then love complicated everything

I’ve known her since High School. We used to study together, laugh, sing, comfort each other at our lowest points. Then my best friend told me she had feelings for me so I invited her on a date. We got together and it was magical but then things changed and everything became so difficult (talking to her had been so easy then it became a stress filled nightmare) she then started playing games/being hot and cold then everything fell apart. We broke-up but It felt like I had lost a piece of myself. We bumped into each other at our old Coffee Shop hangout and started talking again and it seemed like old times then she started being (hot and cold, playing games) I just want to ask her point blank “Why” and that I want things to go back where they were. I just don’t know what to do.
submitted by Edge5880 to dating_advice [link] [comments]


2020.12.02 03:45 Edge5880 She (22f) and I (24m) were friends for years then love complicated everything

I’ve known her since High School. We used to study together, laugh, sing, comfort each other at our lowest points. Then my best friend told me she had feelings for me so I invited her on a date. We got together and it was magical but then things changed and everything became so difficult (talking to her had been so easy then it became a stress filled nightmare) she then started playing games/being hot and cold then everything fell apart. We broke-up but It felt like I had lost a piece of myself. We bumped into each other at our old Coffee Shop hangout and started talking again and it seemed like old times then she started being (hot and cold, playing games) I just want to ask her point blank “Why” and that I want things to go back where they were. I just don’t know what to do.
submitted by Edge5880 to relationship_advice [link] [comments]


2020.12.02 03:44 Outrageous-Reveal-21 I’ve got the single woman blues. Feeling super down today.

I’ve got the single woman blues. Feeling super down today.
What would you say to a woman who has never been loved?
Just wanted to be very honest because this has been bothering me for a long time. I struggle on occasion when the thoughts come up.
I’ve wanted to be in a relationship since I was very young (probably since I was 10, maybe even younger) but love has never happened for me. I was quite shy as a child. In school, there were boys I liked, but they always ignored me and I was teased. A really awkward time (but elementary, middle and high school are usually like that)
College was tough. There was a guy who I was very much infatuated with but he turned out to be a huge bully. He spread rumors about me to everyone he knew and many of his friends were always making rude remarks when I walked by (yes, imagine these people were over the age of 18). It was humiliating.
Then in graduate school I befriended a guy who I immediately began crushing on. He knew all along how I felt about him and kept me around because he really liked how much attention I gave him while he was seeing other girls. I don’t know why I stayed in the “friendship”. It was going on for 4 years. Until it got to the point when my feelings were so overwhelming that I could not stand being around him. So I confessed to him how I felt about him as a release for me. Naturally, I was rejected. I asked for space and we never spoke again. He stopped talking to all my friends too. Sure, it was gutsy but also humiliating, facing rejection once again.
I finished school and am back home now living with my parents. There was a family who was interested in me meeting their son but they retracted their proposal (I know, a very old fashioned way of doing things) because I was unemployed.
Romance was never in the picture for me. Absolutely no luck in that department. I stood on the sidelines, while all my friends and many other young women my age were chosen by great guys. They were always noticed and approached anytime we went out. I felt overlooked, invisible, unwanted, undesired, unattractive. I know one must not put their worth in someone else’s approval. As a woman though, it’s been a very painful experience for me. To experience rejection time and time again. There hasn’t been a guy out there who has ever asked me out, taken the time to get to know me or want to invest in me. It’s the worst feeling in the world. Even more so because I am a romantic at heart. I’ve longed to know the intimacy of a significant other. All these years, it’s never happened. I’m now 27. Sometimes I feel like a lost cause.
But then there are times when I enjoy my singleness. It’s all I’ve ever known, and, spending it with the Lord and my family has made this time valuable. I have time for passion projects, other hobbies, investing in close friendships. These carefree moments will never come back again and I’m trying to make the most of them.
I also never wanted to be THAT girl. Yes, the girl who serial dates and is ALWAYS in a relationship and can’t be on her own for more than a month. I have close friends who are like this.
But this still doesn’t detract from the fact that I want to be loved and wanted in a romantic way. I’ve never known the feeling. I’ve longed to know what it would be like to have my feelings reciprocated, or for someone to want to pursue me. I was sad because I felt (and still do at times) that no man wanted me. Of course it’s not true but if it’s never happened before (plus the bullying, heartache, countless rejections), but, what else was I supposed to think? It affected my self-esteem, I’m ashamed to say. It’s hard when you see some girls get all the guys. Everywhere they walk, they catch a man’s attention. It’s never been the case for me.
I’ve always wondered that feeling, the moment you catch someone’s attention and he really fancies you. That he will do anything to pursue you. That he tells all of his family and friends about you, because that’s how awesome and amazing he thinks you are.
Every Valentine’s Day, I spend with my family (and the same thing will happen this year, and I’ll be ok with that). When I was at school, I spent it on my own, ordering in a delicious meal and watching a movie or spending it catching up with a close friend. But never with a man who loves me. Never had a secret admirer either.
I don’t even know what I’m asking. God always says He has a plan. It’s very hard waiting. Marriage is a challenge in itself. It takes a lot of hard work. I often wonder what it’s like to be on the other side. I often wonder about companionship in a mate. After all, God designed helpmeets for us.
I’ve known many women who are well into their 40s and still haven’t met the right one. They are still single and wish to be married. They feel lonely as many of their friends and peers are coupled up. I’m very scared at such a prospect. I distinctly remember when I was in high school, my drama teacher at the time (who was such a kind lady), had mentioned how hard it was for her being in her mid 40s, watching her married friends enjoy their lives while she couldn’t even get a date. This is a sad reality for many women. What can you even say?
It truly is out of my hands.
submitted by Outrageous-Reveal-21 to ForeverAlone [link] [comments]


2020.12.02 03:44 Edge5880 She (22f) and I (24m) were friends for years then love complicated everything

I’ve known her since High School. We used to study together, laugh, sing, comfort each other at our lowest points. Then my best friend told me she had feelings for me so I invited her on a date. We got together and it was magical but then things changed and everything became so difficult (talking to her had been so easy then it became a stress filled nightmare) she then started playing games/being hot and cold then everything fell apart. We broke-up but It felt like I had lost a piece of myself. We bumped into each other at our old Coffee Shop hangout and started talking again and it seemed like old times then she started being (hot and cold, playing games) I just want to ask her point blank “Why” and that I want things to go back where they were. I just don’t know what to do.
submitted by Edge5880 to dating [link] [comments]